A Full-time Job

July 12th, 2012
Throughout this journey, I have known the grace supplied by God to carry me through my difficulties.  He has supplied me with the body of Christ that have brought me before Him in prayer.  The outpouring of love has been deeply moving.  While my speech is slightly altered, He gave me a voice to tell others about His saving grace.
I find that during different trials in my life, it is often easy to rise to the difficulty.  God has taught me so much about His promises, and He has always been true to that.  He has never waivered or forsaken me.  I have known His peace, comfort and love.
But I sit here today in great anguish because I have not given Him my best.  I expect Him to be there for me whenever I need Him.  But have I put Him first?  Do I give Him my best?  Do I honour, love and obey Him the way He deserves?
I find I fall short on all these counts.  I do not give HIm my best.  If I was in the presence of earthly royalty, would I do my utmost to show respect, honour them, and bring them a well-thought out memorable gift!
So this morning, I cried out to God to forgive me for giving Him my leftovers.  He deserves my first fruits.  He deserves my undivided attention and love.  He deserves my very best.
I must learn not to expect His support during difficult times, and then live out my other days in unfocused busyness.  So this morning I searched my soul, praised my Saviour, and asked Him to forgive my selfishness. 
Being a Christian is not a part-time position.  It is full-time.  It is a 24 hour, 7 days a week, 365 days a year event.  It possesses every fiber of your body, soul and mind.  It doesn't stop because the trial stops.

When my father gave me a new bible, he dedicated it to me and then wrote the following scripture inside:

Matthew 22:37
‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’

This certainly doesn't sound like I should give God my leftovers.  My earthly father understood the magnitude of this commandment, and I have spent the last 30 years discovering exactly what this means in my life.
While I have had times where I am close to Him and seeking His face, even without the trials.  I am not content to sit at the same place and not move forward.  If my desire is to glorify Him in all things, I must continue to move forward.  That means maturing in my walk with Him. 
Reading the Bible until The Holy Spirit saturates me with His truth and reveals the word He has for me at that moment.  Spending dedicated quiet time with Him.  Searching my heart and soul for any offensive ways.  Praising His Holy Name.  And humbling myself before a mighty God.
The things I encounter and the path I take are not a surprise to God.  He knows me better then I know myself.  I think that part of the journey we are all on is in discovering the difference between who we "think" we are, and who we "really" are.  It is when I am ready to truly look at who I am deep inside, that I can finally start to mature. 
I know God can change me deep within.  He is refining me everyday.  The depth of the maturing for me is measured by the effort I put in.  It is time to stop waiting for the trials to learn the truth, and start using everyday to seek His face!